eternal sunshine of the un-spotless mind

Woohoo, capped off the day early at work. I’ll be leaving in a while to have some “me time”. I actually feel kind of weird leaving the office early because my body clock is used to the nine-hour (or more) work time. But I think this is an opportunity that doesn’t often come. And besides, I’m really itching to go for some reason. Maybe it’s one of those days that you just wanna get out and get away and distract yourself with other things, clear your mind of what you’re usually doing. So I’m going after I let this thing out:

I wonder why I sometimes (or most of the time) can’t tell a proper story well. Especially if it’s very important to me, but I tend to get caught up with all the details; trapped in the feeling of wanting to pour them all out yet conscious of boring people to death, especially if I’m sharing it in a group. I just look like I have some pretty thick face and some handy guts but I realized I have moments like that, feeling uncomfortable to talk about “me” stuff. Maybe I should enroll myself in some Speech class or something? )

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LET GO OF THE BITTERNESS. LET GO OF THE PAIN. LET GO OF THAT ONE THIN THREAD THAT SHOULD’VE BEEN CUT A LONG TIME AGO. JUST… MOVE. FORWARD.

—posted this on my Plurk and Tumblr yesterday after realizing that somehow I’m still hung up on yesterday. Things happened and they happened for a lot of reasons. My life wouldn’t be the same if otherwise happened.

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Found this on cosmopolitan.com: the FOUR GUTSY CHANGES TO MAKE THIS 2010

“You need to push out of your comfort zone in order to grow,” Portmann says. “Thrusting yourself into new situations will teach you about yourself and what you’re capable of.” 

Maybe that’s the reason why I’m in this new situation, experiencing a different kind of experience, feeling a different kind of feeling that I never had before, or maybe I had, but it was in a different context. It’s uncomfortable because it’s a discord, but I guess we need to be shaken up sometimes to excite ourselves and our lives, to see which of our principles still apply when were thrust in a different kind of situation. Or maybe just to test us if we’ve learned from our past mistakes.

The article’s a good read, check it out: CLICK. 

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Since we can’t bang our hearts on the wall, it’s the head that suffers. )